The Empty Nest Syndrome – Part 2

(Click here to read Part 1)

Days were passing by, I was growing weary of the moment when the young Mynah fledglings would learn to fly and leave the nest. It was the month of August and the monsoon was at its best. I was also worried because there is a closed stairway next to the lobby and for the birds to fly outside into the open, they might have to learn to hop first on the staircase or the lobby area. And that was dangerous as the area belonged to Ginger.

One bright sunny evening my husband and I came back from a walk along with Ginger, and the moment I took a step on the stairs, I saw a timid juvenile starling in the corner. A few stairs above was its sibling. They were staring at me wide eyed, wondering at the huge creature they encountered! Suddenly there was a commotion as Ginger followed me and one of the Juveniles fluttered around, gathered courage and flew out into the open. The other one was close to the top landing and was just hopping around. Holding Ginger by her collar, we locked her in and ventured out to help the juvenile. By help I mean shooing it away so that it could go out in the open and try to fly.

But then we heard a cacophony, the Mynah parents were close by; sitting on a Neem tree, across the street, they had been watching every move and disapproved of our teaching lessons. However, my husband, in his exuberance, guided the junior all the way down the staircase and finally out in the open! The Junior kept sitting timidly under the lamp post.

Successful that we had finally united the family, we returned and took our positions next to the window, curiously watching the flying lesson in progress. The parents had kept a vigilant eye on their young ones and were encouraging it to perch high next to them on the Neem tree. But our Junior was too adamant. It wouldn’t budge. After some coaxing and cajoling from the parents, it finally crossed the road, again hopping and we lost it in the thick grass on the other side. It was continuous flights of the parents to the spot that I realized it had fallen into the drain on the opposite side. It was already past six and soon it would be dark. Even the clouds had started gathering and were threatening to pour!

Worried that it might drown, my husband and his buddy, Thakur, went down to help. The moment Thakur picked up the young one to keep it across on the dry patch, the parent came swooping down on him, dive bombing; something that I had only read about but was seeing for the first time. Luckily for Thakur, he dodged and saved himself. The parents, who had been sitting on the Neem tree all this while suddenly started swooping one by one at every passer-by, stray dog, cyclist, any one till the Junior hopped to a safe distance into the field on the other side.

All this while, my eyes were searching the other Juvenile that had exhibited courage and flown away. There, I suddenly spotted the family of four together on a mound across! One could distinctly make out the two juveniles and two parents. It was almost an hour that we had returned from our walk and had been glued to the window.

Finally, we saw the young ones take small flights and soon the Mynah family became four dots, merging with the surroundings. I and my husband, who had not spoken aloud but had held same fears gave out a sigh of relief. Realizing it was dinner time I had to move to the kitchen to take charge, I got up to work but couldn’t help thinking about the Juniors, their parents, how they would spend their first night out in the open, away from the comfort of their safe confined space, the home! I was missing the Mynah family! After all they had been our constant companions for almost two plus weeks! Within an hour the young ones had learnt how to fly; soon they would also learn to be independent and move on!

With that nagging thought, I reflected over my own Juvenile young ones! The young adults! Despite knowing the fact that life has to go on, one still suffers from the Empty Nest Syndrome. I suffered it when my elder one joined NDA, which happened all of a sudden, within a couple of months! And then again after four years, when my younger one left home to pursue his under-graduation. All the time, while the children are in class XII, we, the parents keep worrying over their future, admissions into A-1 colleges; it is but natural for us all to be worried. However, the moment they leave home, the home feels like a piece of construction, it loses its sense of humor and joy! Having experienced that pain, the Empty Nest Syndrome, and having drawn strength from the Mynah parents, I am enjoying the fact that Boys are around. The times are uncertain and the young ones will have to fly away one day to establish themselves in this world.

This time, I will be better prepared to let them go, for I have learnt my role. It is just to be around if needed. The most important lesson I have learnt is that my only job as a parent is to make them independent. I need to stop hovering around and micro-managing their affairs, allow them discover their strength and fly away. All that is in our control is to sit aside like the Mynah parents on the Neem tree, and keep a watchful eye!