Changing my ways

I still remember the time,
I did numerous blunders,
I think of them now
And regret why I did those.

Many excuses did I make to satisfy myself,
But the truth stares at me, the past I can’t change;
Struggling to rectify those mistakes
A sense of remorse descends my soul.

Many a time have I questioned myself?
Where was the real me then?
Where was my conscience?
But no answer I could give.

I do think of telling others
About those bad times of mine;
But the thought of then ignoring me
Questioned my heart.

After much struggle, I resolved
To forgive me, to change my way;
The past is not in my heart to change
But, surely I can change my present.

I implored the divine to forgive me.
I hope he did so;
With such a positive attitude
Put my step on the other path.

Halfway only have I traveled
I find it quite difficult;
Having traveled for long, I realize
This is the actual way I should walk.

-TAMAR K. MARAK