Lost Innocence

Up until a few years ago, I taught at a college. In one of my classes, I remember this moment of anguish. On that day, I had assigned the students to write an essay on capital punishment for rapists and murderers. Even though 99% of the class supported capital punishment, there was one student who opposed it. Essentially, he thought girls should be punished for wearing revealing clothes, smiling at boys and acting flirtatiously toward them. I was shocked by how vehement his words were. When they heard this, the rest of the students wanted to stone him to death. And then they wanted to watch him slowly bleed to death. Of course, my response was befitting for that student. In addition, I asked the students to discuss when they became disillusioned and haughty and when they lost their innocence.

How do we decipher this new mindset…where do we begin? On one hand, we have young people who will go to great lengths for the voiceless, the elderly, the poor, the disabled, etc. On the other hand, we have young people who resort to violence for trivial reasons.

Every day we hear news of atrocities. The boyfriend stabs the girlfriend because she won’t accept his advances. A friend kills another over a disagreement. The most recent instance involved a daughter stabbing her mother for not getting her share of the property. As I watch the youth use violence so readily to prove their might, I wonder when the innocence of these children was lost.

In our youth days we enjoyed sharing news with friends and joking around. Today’s youth however are different. When did the scowl, the arrogant gait and the care-a-damn attitude make their way into our lives? The question is when did youngsters stop enjoying the small pleasures of life? When did they start believing the world owed them something that, if unfulfilled, may lead to brute force?

Before his voice box cracks and his voice changes from boy to man or his little moustache sprouts above his lip, this little boy becomes a disillusioned ageless youth. Does his mother’s face not come to mind when he throws acid or hurls violence against a young girl? Can’t thoughts of his mother prevent him from hurting someone else? When he raises his hand to wield a gun or plunge a dagger into another human, does his childhood memories not stop him?

Parents should, in my opinion, ask their children why they are acting violently when their behavior shows the first signs of violence. Surely they should remind them that we didn’t teach you violence when we held your hands and showed you how to write or tie your shoes. While we taught you to sharpen a pencil or ride a bicycle, we did not also teach you to tread the path of destruction. What and who influenced you so that you forgot all that we, as your parents, have shown you.

We cannot allow politicians, religious leaders, or local goons to use these impressionable youths as weapons of social destruction or self-destruction. As parents, society, and teachers, our responsibility is to ensure that youth do not become weapons of mass destruction. Instead they should be nurtured for their valued abilities, skills, and imaginations. Failure or unrequited love, financial constraints or slights by someone should not be the breaking point for this fragile young mind. It is critical to teach them how to accept failure and loss without feeling like a loser.

As parents, teachers, or as a society, we can take a few measures. Being a caring adult in a child’s life is extremely valuable. Try to teach our children empathy and compassion. If they need your attention, make sure you are there to provide it, so they don’t turn to unwanted company. Ensure that you demonstrate how to handle difficult situations in a calm way.

If humanity is to prosper, we need to teach each and every young person the cardinal rule of nature: live and let live.